One thing that is certain in any human relationship is hurt. You will get hurt in that relationship. Be it intentional or unintentional, hurt will always find its way into that relationship. I personally believe that the best way to maintain a relationship is to go into it with the mindset that you will get hurt.
The issue about getting hurt is not about the hurt itself; it is about how it is managed. Nothing hurts like hurt not well managed. Yes, you can manage the hurt so your relationship is not hurt. You can be hurt without feeling the pain.
Pain is a product of how you intepret hurt. A negative view of what happened will deepen the pain, while a positive view will reduce the pain to bearest minimum. You can bear it if you see it in positive light. There is good in every bad. In other words, there are lessons to learn and wisdom to gain in everything that happens to us.
When something goes wrong between you and your partner, always remind yourself that the person who just hurt you is the same person that has always loved you and you also love. He/she is the same person that always stood by you when things weren’t going the way you expected; the shoulder that helped you hang on to your hopes and the hands that held you up.
The mind regulates the emotions and how we handle those emotions. Thinking right makes things go right, no matter what may have gone wrong. You can make pain loose its pain. How?
a. Acknowledge the fact that the person who hurt you loves you or once did.
b. He/she could hurt you because you love or loved him/her. You feel hurt because you love the person that caused the hurt.
c. Refuse to think by the dictates of the pains caused by the hurt.
d. Deliberately pick lessons and wisdom from what transpired.
e. Refuse to think like a victim. You can’t be a victim of someone you truly love.
f. Refuse to be bitter; keep your mind straight and keep loving your partner whether he/she is still in the relationship. You owe it to yourself to keep going in life no matter who is with you or left you.